"Motivational" Posters

My BFF works in a department that most people are afraid to go anywhere near.  Not so much because of the nature of the work that they perform...  but more because of the volatile atmosphere.  We're talking screaming matches, theft, vandalism of personal property, fist fights, etc.  AT WORK!  There is one woman in particular who is the common denominator in every single battle, and in Katie's words "that b1tch be crazy!" 

In an effort to alleviate some of the animosity in the department, a couple of the group's employees have taken it upon themselves to display varying motivational posters and email daily inspirational quotes to the entire department.  So naive...  So optimistic...  So completely delusional...  Katie of course sends them my way...  Not to inspire me, but to allow me the opportunity to laugh and mock others right along with her.  Because, seriously...  I think fist fights and vandalism are way beyond the point of "thinking happy thoughts" to make it all go away.  Personally, I think someone needs to be fired.  Namely, "Crazy B1tch."  But we're not big on change around here, so I think unless the actual police get involved (as opposed to our rent-a-cops on campus), Crazy B1tch's job seems to be safe.

Being the super-awesome BFF that I am, I have taken it upon myself to help Katie locate some amazing motivational posters of her own that she can share with her department.  Personally, I think that I would be much more inspired to shape up my behavior and attitude if I was sent one of these as opposed to a sweet little poster telling me to "Rise Above."

The mere thought of having to ask, "You want fries with that?" on a daily basis should be enough to send any grown person into a panic.  I think if my boss sent me this poster, I'd shape up fast!

I think this would work well too.  Short.  Sweet. Concise.  Effective.

What exactly are you trying to say?!?  I don't want to be the stupid person!

This is one of those reverse psychology things.  "Wait a minute!  The smart people left?  I guess I need to quit so I can say I'm a smart person!"

A not-so-subtle way of telling everyone to "embrace change."

Okay...  So this one would probably provoke another screaming match or fist fight, but I think it's pretty funny.  :-)

And these, I just think are funny and wanted to share...

While my approach to group motivation and team building might be a little unconventional, I think it could work.  Katie, tell your boss if he's not going to outright fire Crazy B1tch, he should at least consider sending out my motivational posters.  You never know...  It could work!  (Although in Crazy B1tch's case, I think a little jail time is the only solution.)