Ode to My Reduction - Day Eight

On the eighth day of Boob Job

The Good Witch gave to me…

… Eye-contact from men …

(I’ve always said that I would only marry the man who could stare longingly into my eyes for hours on end. This is, perhaps, why I am still single. You see, women with bountiful bosoms generally encounter three types of men:

“The Fidgeter” – These are the guys who know you’re well endowed, but who are terrified to look for fear of being caught. First, they look at their feet. Then they realize you might be offended by that so they make an attempt at eye contact. The second they do, they become very aware that they can’t stop thinking about your chest. They’re certain that you’ll be able to read it in their eyes, so they quickly stare at the wall behind you. They wring they’re hands. They break out into a sweat. Their eyes dart from the wall to the ceiling to your forehead… anywhere but your eyes or your chest… And sadly, these guys are the lesser of the three evils.

Then you have “The Deer-in-the-Headlights Guys” – These are your morally upstanding guys. They absolutely will not offend you by looking at your breasts or by losing eye contact with you for even one millisecond. In fact, they are concentrating so hard on maintaining eye contact that they don’t even allow themselves to blink. Their eyes remain as wide as saucers. Hence, “the Deer-in-the-Headlights” title.

Finally, you have “The Bumbling Fools” – Yes, this term seems to apply to most men in most situations, but for the well-endowed women, the “Bumbling Fools” are the eye-popping, jaw-dropping droolers. They behave like a puppy who’s about to be given a treat. These are the guys who couldn’t remove their eyes from your breasts if you paid them. They go into a kind of hypnotic trance. These guys are completely useless. You’ll get nothing out of them except a “hubba-hubba” and a lot of drool. :-)

… A little bit less cleavage …

… Clear view of my feet …

… NO MORE BACK PAIN!!! …

… No more injuries …

… Many shirts that button …

… Matching bras and panties …

And a small pair of perky boobies!