Monkey had his first overnight with his daddy this past weekend. It's kind of funny. I've been saying for months how much I want these extended visits for Monkey and his dad in order to make the transition easier. After this weekend, I'm beginning to realize that I needed these visits just as much (maybe more) than Monkey. (Okay, so maybe I knew that all along, but now I'm just admitting it to myself. :-)
Monkey was busy "reading" when his daddy came to get him on Saturday morning, but as soon as he realized he was there, he speed-crawled across the living room and practically climbed up his dad's leg and into his arms. He immediately started waving "bye-bye" to me. I will admit that my feelings might be a little hurt by that if he didn't do the exact same thing in reverse every time he comes back. :-)
I went over the "bedtime basics" with his dad, showed him his favorite blanket and bunny rabbit that I packed, and raved about the virtues of Huggies Overnite Diapers and pointed out the one that I had sent for him. I kissed my baby, told him I loved him, and told them both to have fun. And then I had a mini panic attack when I shut the door. (Hey... You can't be calm, cool, and collected all the time!)
I spent my weekend shopping, cleaning, and sleeping, and Buddy and Ka-Diva came over on Saturday afternoon for some much-needed one-on-one (well, two-on-one) Fun Aunt Tammy time. I will admit to staring at the clock all evening and wondering how Monkey was doing around bedtime. I will admit to still sleeping with the baby monitor on. I will admit to waking up at 6:30am, 7:00am, and 7:30am before finally making myself sleep in for the first time in ten months. It was surprisingly the cat who eventually woke me up through the baby monitor! He was wandering around the house, crying, and looking for Monkey!
When Monkey got back to the house that afternoon, he launched himself at me, waved "bye-bye" to his daddy, and then demanded to get down so he could chase Kitty Cat Tommie around the house. Tommie was so relieved to see him that he didn't even care! :-)
Monkey was tired, but happy. His dad always fills me in on everything care-related, so I learned that Monkey coughed a little bit at night (fortunately it wasn't a bad episode... Those can be horrible!) He said it went well though, and with Monkey happily playing the rest of the evening, I believe him. He ended up going to bed by 6:40 last night because he was worn out, and I had to wake him up this morning myself to get him ready for daycare. I think it will take a little longer for him to get used to sleeping over there, but he seems to be adjusting just fine.
It turns out, I'm the one who desperately needed this transition time, and I am extremely grateful for it! I never got that with Booger. I just took him to daycare the morning of court and never saw him again. I can't begin to say how grateful I am that he came back into my life six months later! I can feel the difference with Monkey's case. This time, I've been given the opportunity to prepare myself to let go of being his sole caregiver. These last few weeks before he goes home have given his father and I time to develop a good working relationship and to make this transition easier on everyone. But these overnights... I think they're for me. :-)
I have never had a foster child that did overnights but I can imagine me staring at the clock wondering what he's doing! I can totally understand about you needing the overnighters!
ReplyDeleteWhen my baby j goes on visits it gives me time to shop, bank, talk on the phone, and spend time with the baby alone!
Praying everything continues smoothly with dad!
Yes, the visits help. I am glad monkey is doing so well. My older kids had a much harder time. I hope this means dad is a good care giver!
ReplyDeleteI think a reunification transition is really important for everyone. Glad Monkey's is going well.
ReplyDeleteTransition is so important. Carrot Top starts this weekend with his first 2night visit home with his Dad. It's gonna be tough but I'm happy for them!
ReplyDeleteSo glad to hear things went well, but I feel very sad all of a sudden for Tommie! lol
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