25 Random Tammy Things

 

 

1. I don't eat blue food. It is just not right. My logic? If God wanted us to eat blue things, there would be blue things in nature for us to eat (and blueberries don't count because, technically, you're not supposed to eat them until they are purple).

2. I write about totally random things. You name it, I've probably blogged about it at some point (or WILL blog about it just to prove my point). My breast reduction, the awesomeness of my stapler, my dream of the Lawnmower Man, my dislike of sweat... I've blogged about it all!

3. I want to publish a book of my random blogs and witty emails. It's all floating around the Internet as it is... I might as well collect some royalties off of it.

4. I LOVE LISTS!!! I make lists of the lists that I need to make. I'll even ADD something to my list that I've already done, just so I can check it off as being completed!

5. I will marry the man who proposes to me with free-flow ink highlighters. HIGHLIGHTERS ROCK!!!

6. There is nothing more irritating than walking into a bathroom with three half-used rolls of toilet paper sitting everywhere EXCEPT on the toilet paper holder.

7. I would love to make a living off of writing greeting cards. But not your typical greeting cards... I want to write cards for EVERY occasion. Because you never know when you're going to need a good luck card for a vasectomy reversal or consolation card for a doctor being sued for malpractice.

8. I love taking personality tests and being profiled. Mostly because I fall into the "less than 1% of the population" area, and my shrinks and professors are completely stumped by me. I am a walking contradiction to myself. It's a lot of fun! It's also partly why I'm on bipolar medication. :-)

9. I'm sarcastic, witty, stubborn, and pretty much say exactly what's on my mind without really caring whether or not it will get me into trouble. On the other hand, I'm extremely empathetic, a great listener, and I have a way of knowing what someone needs from me. I have this romantic spirit and am constantly trying to see the beauty in everyone and everything. While I love my lists, love order, and can be practical at times, I also believe in reaching for the stars and in going for your dreams.

10. I never finished college because I can't make up my freaking mind about what I want to do! Do they even HAVE a degree for Marine Biologist/Photojournalist/Greeting Card Writer/Social Workers who do Interior and Architectural Design on the side?

11. I'm a reality show junkie. And the crazier, the better. Nothing makes you feel better about yourself than watching people who are more screwed up than you make complete fools of themselves on national television.

12. I love watching The Biggest Loser until about week 7, when those fat chicks end up weighing less than me. Then, not so much.

13. I can do all sorts of things fairly well, and can pick up pretty much anything if I try. But I can not for the life of me draw or paint. It's rather embarrassing when a 3-year-old takes the paper from you and says, "Here, Tammy... Let me do that for you."

14. I've ALWAYS wanted a house FULL of kids, but I've NEVER wanted to be pregnant. I've always wanted to adopt AT LEAST five children.

15. According to my preschool teacher, I am "a natural leader." Although, I think that was her politically correct way of saying, "Tammy is extremely bossy."

16. I LOVE that my niece is EXACTLY like me. She is a 34-year-old in a 4-year-old's body. I'll never have to wonder what my own biological children would be like, because she's it. My Mini Me. Poor Christy and Chris... They're gonna have their hands full with her. :-)

17. I think my nephew is the sweetest, most entertaining, most endearing kid on the planet. I think he's going to be our little actor in the family. I totally see him doing musical theater. (Chris is probably freaking out right about now at the mere mention of it. :-)

18. I'm terrified of falling. Me falling. Other people falling. It doesn't matter. It's not so much that I'm afraid of heights (although that's just further to fall!). I don't even like to stand on an 8 inch step stool if it's not solidly planted on the ground. But seeing as how I've falling down flights of icy stairs TWICE now, the fear of falling thing seems valid to me.

19. I believe that firemen are about the SEXIEST people on the planet. Well, firemen and Steve Burton (aka. Jason Morgan on General Hospital). Oh! And Tim McGraw! And now that I think about it... Matthew McCaunoghey is rather yummy too. And cowboys! But not the icky, dirty cowboys with no teeth who roll around in cow poop and never bath... I'm thinking more along the lines of the ones who tame wild horses and stuff.

20. I DESPISE cleaning the bathroom more than anything in the world. I will soon be hiring a maid JUST to clean my bathroom. (And you people think I'm kidding...)

21. I would LOVE to homeschool my brood of children and go RV-ing across the US. There's no better way to learn than to see and do hands' on!

22. I love photography. I love the rush I get when I see something that I'm not necessarily looking for, but find anyway and capture it on film. I love how I can look at a photo even years later, and still feel that rush, or remember the exact moment... A picture really can speak a thousand words.

23. I LOVE ROAD TRIPS!!! I think the best vacations are the ones that are completely unplanned. Hop in the car, and see where it takes you. I love to turn onto unmarked lanes and see where they go (although I learned not to do that in a rental car. They frown upon their vehicles bottoming out).

24. I think my sister would probably disagree with me on the whole "loving road trips" thing. We can't seem to catch a break when it's just the two of us! (Although the six room "motel" wasn't so bad at 4:30am after a 24 hour drive, and the nice mechanics in Sweetwater, TX still have a fond place in our hearts. :-)

25. I need to stop now. I really can't be charming and witty much longer as I've been coughing, sneezing, and blowing my nose in between typing this. My snot runneth over. ME SO SEXY!!! Who wouldn't want to get with this?!? (By the way... I'm still available for all of you single men out there! ;-)

More Recipes for the Cooking-Impaired

It’s that time again. The time of the year when potlucks and family dinners abound… The time of year that puts fear into the hearts of the culinarily-challenged… Is your idea of a gourmet meal macaroni and cheese with cut up hotdogs? Mine too! So once again, I have decided to share one or two of my “Recipes for the Cooking-Impaired” to help you through the month ahead.

Black Forest Angel Food Cake

1 Box Angel Food Cake Mix
1 Can Cherry Pie Filling
4 Tbs Cocoa
Top with Cool Whip after cooling

Dump angel food cake mix, cocoa, and cherry pie filling into a mixing bowl.
Mix together for one minute on medium speed.
Pour into non-greased, non-floured angel food cake pan.

Bake at 350 degrees for approximately 40 minutes.


Or, for the Slightly More Courageous…

Holiday Potatoes

8-10 potatoes
1 cup sour cream
1 - 8 oz bar cream cheese
1 tsp onion powder
1 stick butter
½ tsp garlic powder
salt
pepper

Boil and mash 8-10 potatoes.
Add all additional ingredients.
(Salt and pepper to taste.)
Mix well.
Grease deep casserole bowl with butter.

Bake in a 350 degree pre-heated oven for one hour.

Time Flies

Holy crapfire! My homestudy is in 12 days!!! I could have a baby before the first of the year at this rate!

The training is going really well. Lots of things to think about and there are some really nice families going through the training as well. Definitely a wide variety of people... I think we've weeded out the crazys though. We had the creepy, obnoxious guy who was too stupid to figure out that he wanted to adopt, not foster. And most recently, we lost the couple who swore that it was a "deal-breaker" if they weren't allowed to carry their loaded, concealed weapons while they were carrying the baby. Bummer.

My mom's going through all of the classes with me (thank goodness!). I definitely need the extra set of ears and all of the support. My dad came over last weekend and installed the child locks on the cabinets for me. And Lori came down from Oklahoma and helped me register at Target. I decided I should get to have some scanning fun even though I'm not squeezing a squirming infant out of my nether regions. I still have a TON of stuff to do and buy before the homestudy, but it's coming along well. Luckily, Christy has two of everything and boy and girl stuff that I can borrow until I get my own!

I'm nervous. I'm excited. I'm freaking out! But I can't wait!

Many a Time We-Moved

Several years ago, my sister, my cousins, and I had a Girls' Night... And somehow, we ended up discussing the confusing nature of the whole "2nd cousin, twice removed" thing. WHAT THE HECK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!? Are they my cousin's cousin on the other side who have married and divorced two times? At that point, are they really even my cousin? I have my step-grandfather's, step-grandson who I call my semi-sort of step-step cousin. Does that make him my 4th cousin thrice removed? Personally, I think if they are not a direct blood relative of your blood aunt or uncle, then they are NOT YOUR COUSIN!!! The numbering system is way too complicated.

That night, the girls and I decided that the "removed" portion of the phrase is actually meant to be "we-moved." For example, at the time Ariel was my 1st cousin, once we-moved (because she had only moved once). Sheena was my 1st cousin, twice we-moved (she had moved twice). Christy was the girls' 1st cousin I believe quadruple-a-time we-moved (she'd moved several times by that point). I, however, am the big winner at 1st cousin many-a-time we-moved (I've moved more times than I can count thanks to my crazy bipolar tendencies, and I don't think there's a fancy word for "23").

Source

 

 

This leads me to my dilemma. I'm in the process of completing my agency application, and they are asking for my address history over the past ten years. Seeing as how I've lived in at least EIGHT places over the past ten years, I'm a little at a loss for the addresses and timing of it all. I don't suppose any of you have an old address book with multiple scratched out entries for me, do you? If you could possibly send me the addresses that you might have for me, I can figure out the timing.

Quite honestly, there were a few places that I have chosen to block from my memory... Places that I won't be discussing with the social worker. I don't think they need to know about "the early years." No Porno Guy and the Sex People... (Brings back memories, doesn't it Case?) No getting locked IN the same apartment because the "safety" lock got stuck... No rotting rat corpses... No having to duck below the window sills at night for fear of being shot at by the neighbors housed in the hotel where people lived across the street... No having to move out early because Sam threw up on our carpet... No holes being BURNED in our carpet because Sam felt the need to play with lighters... On second thought... Maybe I just won't mention Sam. He seems to be the trouble-maker here. (Love you, babe!)

And I'll leave out the little details about our neighbors in the Portland apartment. They don't need to know that Melissa and I got stoned every day off of the second-hand pot smoke from the downstairs neighbors or that Sheena's virgin ears were introduced to the sounds of seriously loud lovin' from the same people (Well, the man and his mistress anyway. His wife was having NONE of him at the time, a fact that we were also aware of from the screaming fights). I might also omit the fact that I had to duct tape my back door shut in the duplex to keep the critters from crawling in because the builder refused to come out and put the weather stripping on.

I'm not too concerned. I mean, really! How many of us haven't had daily contact with Ugly Naked Guy? Isn't that just normal? And it really shouldn't shock the social worker when they enter my apartment and it sounds like the ceiling is going to cave in from the all-hours love fest coming from upstairs. Love is a beautiful thing, isn't it?

So, send me any addresses old or new that you might have for me from over the years (along with any fun stories that you might remember from the different places I've lived... Might be good for my book, even if they don't bode well for the homestudy...).

Getting Ready

Wow! It looks like I hit the foster/adopt agency at just the right time. The agency that I chose is having their next session of training classes from October 20th - November 8th, and I start the homestudy immediately after that. It looks like I might have a kiddo in the house in the next few months! YIKES!

Most people have nine months to prepare, so I'm cramming nine months of "nesting" into about four weeks. Apparently they like potential families to have things pretty well set up before the homestudy so they know you're prepared. Thank goodness Christy has boy/girl twins and hasn't gotten rid of all of their stuff yet! That should help out until I can pull together everything of my own.

I'm so excited! I've decided to request only infants (under 1 year old) to start out while the twins are still young. They are much more comfortable around younger children than they are with older kids. I'll just increase the ages I'd be willing to accept as the twins get older. Because our family is so close, I need to make sure this is right for everyone. While I think it will be harder to return a baby that I've had from a young age (essential being the only "mom" it has ever known), the day-to-day living will be easier than taking in an older child with more severe emotional needs. I would worry too much about how an older child would interact with the twins. I definitely want to take in older children eventually, but I want to wait until the twins are old enough to stand up for themselves. (Although Ka-Diva is pretty pushy already... My "Mini-Me"... I might be more worried about a 10-year-old foster child if it was just Ka-Diva!)

So it looks like before long, my life will be filled with poopy diapers and paperwork galore. My hope is that the child only poops while in the care of others. That will be our first conversation. "Hi, sweet baby! I'm going to be your mommy for a little while. Please no pooping unless you're at Nana's or Aunt Christy's houses." I'm really excited about the paperwork though. I LOVE lists, forms, and highlighters!!! It's a good thing too, because apparently every little thing has to be documented. I'm going to have to update my "Who I'd Like to Meet" section on MySpace with, "a man who brings me office supplies and changes poopy diapers!" He would make me happy!