Giveaway Time Again!

"Trippin'" just hit 75 followers on Facebook,

so it's Giveaway Time again!!!

I LOVE doing giveaways!

:-)

I'm going with something totally practical this time.  A $25 gift card to the winner's choice of store, restaurant, etc. (as long as I can order it online ;-).

Entry into this one is easy!  (Okay, so I'm totally lying.  I'm gonna make you work for this one. ;-)  I'd like to bring back "Foster Fridays" in some form, but I need help brainstorming topic ideas.  That's where you come in!

Just leave a comment (either here on the Facebook page) with your foster care related topic ideas and/or any questions that you might have about the "Who, What, Where, When, Why, and How's" of foster care.  And as an added bonus, if you come up with 5 or more, I'll give you an extra entry! 

I will announce the winner on Thursday evening, and will (hopefully) have a new "Foster Friday" post this Friday.

Let the brainstorming begin!!!

Major Development - Advice Welcomed!

If you don't follow "Trippin'" on Facebook, you probably don't know the latest development in Monkey's case.  Definitely a HUGE turn of events since my last post where I was desperately trying to get Monkey extended visits with his parents who I thought were doing well...

Monkey had a visit yesterday, and his CASA and his attorney pinned down The Invisible One and crashed the visit.  They were both expecting to see Monkey with his parents and to discuss extended visits because the last we had heard (after court in November), the plan was to return Monkey after the next hearing in March.


After the visit, his CASA immediately texted me and said that The Invisible One would be calling me shortly.  Two minutes later, I got a phone call that completely floored me.  The gist of it boiled down to:

• Mom flaked out and took off right after Christmas.  Don't you just LOVE how I (as well as Monkey's CASA and Attorney) am just now hearing about it?

• Mom finally resurfaced last week, and is exhibiting behaviors similar to those when this case first started last May.  Basically, she is no longer an option and if Dad wants custody, he is doing this alone.

• Dad works nights (9:00pm-7:00am) and before CPS will even consider moving Monkey home, Dad has to demostrate that he has a reliable childcare plan in place.

• Dad wants to know if I would be willing to keep Monkey Monday-Thursday nights while he's at work.

• I asked if I could start transporting Monkey to his weekly visits with Dad so I can get a better feel for this whole new development and see if I can figure out what's really going on here.

There is a lot to consider here.  My main concern is that both Dad and the Invisible One are just exploiting my love for Monkey in order to put an end to this case, and that once CPS is out of the picture, Dad will drop me like a hot potato.  Honestly, I think that if Dad can't do this without me, he shouldn't regain custody in the first place! 

I ended up telling the Invisible One that I wasn't saying, "no," but I wasn't saying "yes" right now either.  I told her that Dad needs to move forward as if I am not going to keep Monkey and that I would think about it.  I want to see if he is willing to put in the work and get a plan in place that doesn't involve the "easy" solution.  If he does get something lined up, but still would prefer Monkey stay with me, I think that would ultimately say that his intentions are good and that he truly does want the best for Monkey (maintaining contact with the only Mama he's ever had).

You can follow the discussion on Facebook and add you own experiences, advice, concerns, etc.  There is definitely a lot to consider, and my mind (and heart) are all over the place on this one.  Diane!?!?  If you're reading this, I could definitely use your advice!  I think you are one of the only single foster moms I know of who has been living a similar situation, so I'd love to hear your thoughts.

I definitely wasn't expecting this when I woke up yesterday.  It breaks my heart that Monkey's mom is having such a hard time.  I hate that there are some things that have such a powerful hold over people that they end up choosing that thing over their own child.  I've seen her with Monkey.  I've seen the love that she has for him.  I've seen her clean and sober and trying so hard to be a mom that he can be proud of.  Knowing that this has taken hold again is heartbreaking...  Especially for Monkey.  :(

The Hardest Thing...

It's the hardest thing in the world...  Doing the "right" thing when it means letting go of your child...

I have spent the better part of the past two weeks trying my hardest to find out what is going on in Monkey's case, and to try to get longer, unsupervised visits with his parents if things are still going as well as they were in November.  As far as I know, things are still on track to move him home in March, and I desperately want him to be able to spend some quality time with his parents before that happens.  How can he possibly feel comfortable leaving the only home and only Mama he's ever known when he's going to a strange house and people who he has only seen for one hour a week at a CPS office?


For me, this is the suckiest part of foster care.  Loving a child with my whole heart...  Wanting to be their Mama forever, but knowing that I won't be...  So my days consist of being the best Mama that I can be now, all the while working towards helping my children's biological parents be the best parents they can be when my babies leave.  Quite frankly, it sucks!  But I know that by doing so, I'm still loving and protecting my little ones to the best of my ability even after they leave my home. 

Why wouldn't I try to get parents who are doing well longer visits at home when it means my baby will know them better and be familiar with his new home when he leaves?  Why wouldn't I tell them everything that I know about their baby so they can keep his routine, know his favorite toys, and serve his meals the way he likes them?  Why wouldn't I push his caseworker to do her job and do what's right for this family when they have worked so hard and changed their lives for the better? 

I cherish every single day that I have with my babies, but when it's clear that their families are ready to be the best parents they can be, I know it's time for me to let go.  And it sucks.  Just sayin'...

I Feel Good!

I might not be able to carry a tune in a bucket, but Monkey happens to think that I have a beautiful singing voice.  I open my mouth to sing his favorite songs, and he clearly thinks that a chorus of little birdies is flowing from my lips as he smiles from ear to ear.

Now that I think about it, I'm not sure his grin is necessarily a good thing.  He might be thinking something along the lines of, "Oh, this poor, clueless woman...  This is so pitiful, I just have to laugh it off!"  You know, kind of how there are some puppies and babies who are so ugly that you can't help but say they're cute?  I'm going to choose to believe that Monkey hears golden harps and angels singing rather than a croaking frog when I sing to him though. :-)

We are a fairly musical family regardless of our singing abilities.  Our babies are thoroughly entertained by our renditions of many a song.  Recently, Monkey (and I) had become bored with our usual "Little White Duck," and he thought I was just a crazy fool when I tried my hand at "Rockin' Robin," so I went to Christy's house to see what she used to entertain Pooper and Butterfly.  She and Ka-Diva gave a lively performance of James Brown's "I Feel Good," and the Mini Munchkins were clearly entertained so I knew I had to try it out on Monkey that evening.

I performed my heart out.  I danced what has since become a choreographed routine.

And I created a James Brown fanatic.

Monkey was clapping and cracking up, and I swear he made me sing that song at least ten times in a row that first night.

In the week since I first introduced Mr. Brown's lively little tune, I have caught Monkey "singing" it himself as he looks my way to get me to perform it again.  "Da-da-da-da (SQUEAL!!!)" ***shake head, shake head***  (The head-shaking is his favorite part of the choreography. ;-)  I am fairly certain I have sung that song about 25,000 times in the past six days. 

Thanks for the idea, Aunt Christy!  I now hear James Brown in my sleep.  Mostly coming from the baby monitor as Monkey sings, "Da-da-da-da (SQUEAL!!!)"  ;-)

A Message from Booger Bear

Got an awesome message

from Booger Bear this afternoon...  :-)

And people ask if we regret ever fostering...

They obviously don't have a Booger Bear of their own,

or they'd never have to ask!

:-)