I've finally gotten to a good place when it comes to the Booger Bear. No more bursting into tears every time I think about him and how much I miss him. I still have the occassional night, just as I'm laying down to go to bed, when I think about cuddling up with my little boy and watching him sleep, and I do let myself have a good cry. That's normal though, I'm sure.
Over the past few weeks, I've started working on a baby book for J. It's more of a "memory photo book" with hundreds of pictures (Of course! :-) and lots of journaling with stories and telling all about his "firsts." I called it, "My Year with Mimi," and all of the stories and captions are written straight to Booger. Hopefully his dad will keep it and give it to him when he's older so he will know how much he was loved during his year with me and my family. Even if his dad never gives it to him, at least I feel better having put it together for him.
Next project (as soon as I finish with J's book)... Memory book for Angel!