You see, I haven't done any exercise AT ALL to speak of since I lived in Oregon and Melissa and I went to our apartment gym every night to watch Friends and walk on the treadmills. That was 6 years ago… I haven't done any REAL exercise since I was coaching gymnastics 40 hours a week in college… 12 years ago! So when I stepped into the gym for what I THOUGHT was an orientation on how to use the equipment, you can imagine my shock when that scrawny white girl (herein referred to as "Skinny Bitch") made me get on a bike and told me I was going to ride it for 20 minutes! After picking my jaw up from the floor and silently cursing her for about 10 of the 20 minutes, I started remembering that I actually LIKE working out. I finished the bike just fine. I even went an extra minute just to stick it to her. Although I don't think she was impressed.
Skinny Bitch then led me to the treadmill and set me up for another 20 minutes. "NO PROBLEM! I LOVE THE TREADMILL!" Unfortunately, after my 20 minutes were up, I TOLD Skinny Bitch that I loved the treadmill. She told me that I obviously wasn't doing it right if I loved it so much. Then, she made me RUN! "WHAT THE F#*%?!? ARE YOU FRICKIN' KIDDING ME!?! MY BODY HASN'T RAN IN 20 YEARS!!! NO WAY IN HECK AM I GOING TO RUN" I said.
Wish me luck tomorrow! Skinny Bitch is scheduled to torture me at 3:30pm SHARP (She even called to remind me! I think she gets enjoyment out of making me suffer). Something about an hour of cardio and work on my arms… I don't even want to know…
1 comment:
lol, love it
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