Shaking Depression

I'm trying... I'm trying so hard to shake this depression that I've been in for the past year. The battle between logical reasoning and my knee-jerk emotional reactions to situations has definitely taken a toll on me. It's difficult having reactions that are so completely out of proportion to what they should be. "It's a flat Diet Coke for crying out loud! It's NOT the END OF THE WORLD!!!"

I try to hide it as much as I can, but I completely break down when I'm alone. I make jokes about being "crazy" because I'll lose it otherwise. My normal, organized OCD personality is completely gone, and it's all I can do to force myself to check the mail or take out the trash. My house is a mess, my desk is a mess, my purse is a mess, and at this point, it's all so overwhelming I just want to throw it all away and start over. (I actually got a new checking account so I wouldn't have to balance my old one.)

I know so many of my friends and family have been worried about me, and I really do appreciate all of the support even if I can't always show it. Just know that I'm trying to shake this. They're not kidding when they say that depression affects everyone. I know how worried you all are. I'm trying... Just bear with me a while longer. The doctor is working on me, and I'm doing my best to work on myself...