Friday, January 7, 2011

Gimp-Girl-i-Versary!!!

Yes, my friends...  Today is the one year anniversary of the day that I oh-so-gracefully pulled all of the tendons/ligaments in my ankle and broke my fibula in half by accidentally ice skating on invisible ice!  Fun times, let me tell you!!!

Wheelchair-bound for over a month, I had several embarrassing incidents which naturally resulted in me feeling the need to write about them on the World Wide Web for the entire world to see.  Most embarrassing would have to have been the Naked Gimp SOS Call that I had to send out after having lost access to my clothing after a shower.  Again.  Fun times!!!  :-)

By the end of February, I was given the green light to hobble around a little in my fracture boot.  My Mom, who had been living with the Booger Bear and me while I was wheelchair bound, decided it was time for her to move back home and sleep in her own bed for a change.  Unfortunately, the Magical House-Cleaning Genie who had moved in around the same time that my Mom did decided to move out at the same time as well!  I just didn't understand.  Where did that genie go?!?


By the end of April, I was still having trouble with my "lenkle" (as I like to call my injured leg/ankle).  The ortho decided that I needed to try physical therapy, so he sent me to a rather large German woman name "Olga" who proceeded to torture me for several weeks in a row.  More fun times!

After five months of Gimpihood, I found myself noticing things that I would ordinarily not give a second glance.  I developed an eye for quality mobility assistance devices (meaning, I was eyeing little old ladies fancy walkers and was actually jealous).  I made note of my findings and shared them back in May as I posted my "Observations of the Gimpy One" post.

By June, I had gained most of the mobility back in my ankle, and was able to walk without a limp (for the most part) for the first time in six months.  The pain was pretty much gone unless I did a lot of walking or stairs.  This was about the time that I realized that I had also gained the super-magical power of weather prediction!  I kid you not.  One year later and I will tell you right now that based on the radiating pain in my leg today, my metropolitan area will be experiencing a drastic weather change in the next day or two.  My "lenkle" does not lie.  It hasn't failed me yet!

Yes, the anniversary of that fateful day was fresh on my mind this morning as I went outside to leave for work and came upon the Ominous Metal Grate of Doom.  I stepped boldly, fearlessly, defiantly, and with purpose directly onto the object of my despair over the past year.  "I'll show that metal grate!  Yes-sir-ee!"  (Shoot!  Who am trying to kid?  I got down on my hands and knees and crawled over it like a baby after standing there for a full ten minutes in complete and total hyperventilating panic attack mode.  It sounded good anyway. :-) 

Sure, I might have been ten minutes late for work, but no one seemed to mind my tardiness as they were expecting me to call in sick today anyway.  I was tempted.  Believe me, I was tempted!  But I decided to brave up and face my fear of falling on the Ominous Metal Grate of Doom head-on (in other words, I am saving my "sick days" for days when the temperature falls below freezing and I have no intention of stepping foot outside of my house. :-)

I hope you enjoy reading (or re-reading) posts from the Great Gimpy One as much as I've enjoyed writing them over the past year.  I most likely will be reading them again this weekend myself, as I've just heard that my "lenkle" prediction was correct and a cold front is on its way.  :-)

1 comment:

Nana said...

I hate to tell you this but it's suppose to be below freezing next week with a chance of snow. Avoid the metal grate at all costs!!!!

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